Florida...where class is forgotten.

Police say 29-year-old Jessi Clark, pictured left, was in the passenger seat of a car when officers pulled it over Wednesday night.According to police reports, Clark “pulled out a piece of paper towel from her crotch” that contained three Oxycodone pills and three Xanax tablets.She then pointed her finger at the driver and said he told her to shove the drugs down there before police came. He responded by saying to the cops, he “has no idea what was...

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Minka Kelly keeps trying.

Last night Minka Kelly was walking the red carpet for something and looking ridiculously hot doing it. As she made her way down the red carpet, someone screamed her name. As she turned around, they were holding up a picture of me. This photo was taken at that precise moment. It's a curse to have such a savage and animalistic effect on women. There are times when I'm moisturizing and flexing in the mirror and I pray that my gift of love would be...

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Porn Stache...check.

The world of sports and porn have seen their share of awesome staches, but none can rival this gem. In fact, I'm pretty sure this is the best mustache ever groomed by man. From ESPN:Meet Evan Fjeld, owner of the thickest mustache this side of Tom Selleck. The Dagger's Matt Norlander caught Fjeld's stache in Vermont's loss to UConn Wednesday night, and while Fjeld's 26 points may not have earned the Catamounts the upset, his mustache no doubt left...

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Will Ferrell = Comedic Genius

David Bowie (Will Ferrell) visits Bing Crosby (John C. Reilly) during the holidays to sing a duet of two Christmas classics, Peace on Earth & The Little Drummer Boy. Peace on Earth/Little Drummer Boy with Will Ferrell & John C. Reilly from Will Ferr...

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I'm not sayin, I'm just sayin.

Today, reps of Ryan Reynolds and Scar-Jo annouced that the couple has been separated, living separately, and are divorcing.“After long and careful consideration on both our parts, we’ve decided to end our marriage,” they say in a joint statement. “We entered our relationship with love and it’s with love and kindness we leave it. While privacy isn’t expected, it’s certainly appreciated.”Scarlett Johansson rests atop the sexual desire hierarchy for...

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Hollywood Sucks: Reason # 4,554

Yes, I know this video is like three years old, but of course, I have been thinking about how bad Hollywood sucks. The language is very NSWF. It's laced with the foul words only a first class asshole could use when someone ruins his wittle movie scene. Christian Bale, aka Batman, has been earning a living as a Hollywood actor since his role in Empire of the Sun when he was 13 years old. So, since 1987 he's been living in a fantasy world of luxury for which most people would trade their left arm. It's amazing how someone can be so fortunate...

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Only Californians could screw something up so magical...

Urban legend tells of a "Big One" that would crack along the San Andreas fault sending California floating off into the ocean. First, we couldn't be so lucky. Second, unless you have the intelligence of Dexter Manley, you know that is effing stupid and unfeasible. Regardless, that would be awesome because California is so far off the reservation it probably can never be saved. Only those liberal socialists can take a state that would have the...

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Wikileak is a threat to national security and a much needed vitamin for our democracy

"Information is the currency of democracy" -Thomas JeffersonThis might put me on the watch list, but when it comes to patriotism and the safety of our men and women in harm's way, the bravest and most noble warriors on earth, nothing is more serious. It seems members of Congress are more disturbed by these document's release because it reveals just how inept one governing body can actually become. They also reveal the massive growth of "State Secrets"...

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You know you're a rocket when...

I've been smitten by Natlie Portman since like 1996 when a semi-pedo Bear, Timothy Hutton, was watching his life unravel over the trauma of growing up and especially, her 13 year old beauty in Beautiful Girls. It instantly became one of my favorite movies. Everyone, including me, that witnessed her breakthrough performance, knew right then and there, Natalie Portman was destined for stardom. I've always said being a hot girl is about as powerful...

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